What not to say to Kyla...

My daughter has several combined issues with her ADHD. She is ODD, doesn’t empathize well, and has some sensory issues. Her struggles seem to progress as she ages. She doesn’t wear a sign on her back indicating as much, and we don’t generally mention it. Not because we’re trying to hide it, but because there are so many other interesting things about her that come to mind first: She obsessively loves “My Little Pony” and dancing and singing. She’s witty and has no filter. She’s says the things that no one else will. She’s direct and brutally honest. She reads books that her 10 year old (almost) sister doesn’t even read. And, we love her sassy personality.

 

That said, I am completely tired of hearing the same ignorant responses and questions from people, some complete strangers and some family members. She is too and I pity the person that has the gall to say one of the following in front of her because she will let you know exactly what is wrong with what you said.

·         “All she needs is a good spanking.” Seriously?! I could physically hurt the next person that makes that suggestion.

·         “Sometimes I’m a little ADD.” As if Kyla’s condition boils down to a problem with listening, like she’s purposely disobedient, instead of having an actual mental condition.

·         “Let me take her for a week and I’ll sort her out.”

·         “She’ll grow out of it. A lot of kids just have extra energy.” This is where most people are so completely misinformed. ADHD does not equal constant movement necessarily. Does she fidget? Absolutely! However, her brain requires constant stimulation so you cannot expect her to sit and be quiet without offering some form of stimulation. This is why video games often are associated with ADHD. The games did not create the problem in most cases; the games provide a constant, ever-changing source of stimulation that a child with ADHD benefit from. I’m not saying I plop my child in front of a system, but she has several tools at her disposal and anything she does is educational.

·         “Have you tried                ?” Like I’m a completely incompetent parent. I have three other children, two of which are older than she is. Before we began her several therapies/appointments, we tried alternate diets and extra activity. I would not medicate or pull her out of school unless it was necessary for her happiness and health.

·         “But she’s so smart!” As if she is expected to be otherwise.

·         “ADHD was just created by drug companies” Right, I take her to all her appointments and give her medication just for the fun of it.

·         “Don’t give her (insert name of medicine)!! I don’t want her taking it, I heard it’s bad.” Seriously, like I didn’t thoroughly research any medication before giving it to her. Like I did not report the slightest thing to her doctor and try 3 medications before we found one that worked best for her. All drugs have bad side effects. But those side effects don’t affect everyone and in most cases the good outweighs the bad. Also, most of the negative you hear is due to other’s without a prescription abusing the medication. Make your opinions after you do research.

·         “Oh, she’s just strong-willed” or “typical little girl.” I invite you to join us at our home on a medication free day (weekends).

·         “Everyone has issues like that sometimes.”

·         “I’m sorry” And for what, exactly?! She’s not broken or somehow incomplete. She’s perfect. In fact, in many ways her thought process and responses are wittier than most adults I know.

·         “I don’t know how you do it.” Would you not love, support, and seek every option and opportunity available for your child?

I’m sure I’ve missed some but these are the most prominent. ADHD may be over diagnosed but that does not mean that every child with that diagnosis doesn’t have it. And it does not mean that child is somehow less than perfect. I won’t question your child or your parenting choices when your child shoves his finger up his nose and into his mouth. Or throws a complete, on the floor crying, tantrum in the store when you don’t purchase the toy she wants. So don’t look at my child like she’s out of control or when she has a meltdown due to the suddenly itchy fabric of her shirt or when she loudly tells you to pull your pants up because no one wants to see your booty. (true story)

 

Freeman Beauty #BAREFOOTbliss Review

 

It’s that time of year again when we break out our sandals and flip flops and expose our feet to the sand, sun, and elements. I recently joined Influenster, a community that gives opinions of products, services, and experiences. Once you join you connect all of your social media sites and select badges to work on so that you can qualify for a VoxBox and review products for FREE! Less than a week after I joined, I qualified for the Freeman Beauty Badge. I was thoroughly excited to have been chosen and could not wait to get my hands on the product because I’m never chosen for anything. I received a coupon in the mail to redeem at Walmart for a free Freeman Beauty Barefoot Moisturizing Massage Cream. I had the option to redeem my coupon for the Massage Cream or a foot exfoliator but I feel like I’m always in need of moisture on my feet, so I opted for the cream.

 

I have been using it for a week now and overall – I like it. It is moisturizing, to be sure, and really made my feet feel great. I do think that the scent was maybe too strong but I wouldn’t say it stunk nor would it keep me from buying in the future. Note: I have since paid the full price of $4.96 for my mom to try as well. The Barefoot Moisturizing Massage Cream is lightweight and comes in a 5.3 ounce foot-shaped tube. I have used this product nightly for a week and still have over half a tube left not to mention super soft, slightly luminous feet. I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes. Please ignore the odd photo of my feet...taking a picture was an afterthought.

 

Celeb Baby Names

Did you hear?


Jessica Simpson finally had her baby. She named it Maxwell Drew.

No, she did not have a boy.

She had a girl.

Now, as far as celebrity names go, it isn’t too horrible. Would I name my daughter that? No. But she grew the kid for 500 months, therefore it’s her right to choose. She plans on calling the baby Maxi. I’m sure we’re all thinking of the feminine product now, right?

But again. If that’s what she wants to call her kid, by all means.

As far weird names go, Maxwell is pretty tame compared to what other celebs have named their children.

Pilot Inspektor anyone?

Or….someone named their kid Tabooger. TABOOGER? (Seriously. Dan Cortese and Dee Dee Hemby actually choose that moniker.)

Nicolas Cage must’ve took out his rage on having movie after movie of his bomb so he named his son Kal-el.

And somewhere out there, a child is walking around with the name Moxie CrimeFighter and Fifi TrixieBell.

Now.As I said up there, everyone has a right to name their kid what they want. But why? Is there some secret celeb child society where, if you want your baby to be well liked and accepted, the number one rule is that it MUST be named something bizarre?

I prefer the celebs who refuse to follow this rule and call their children something, well, normal. Think about it. All the actors that are out there now all have basically normal names. Ryan. Brad. Angie. Chris. When the next generation comes through we’re going to get the weirdo names.

The New Spiderman…starring Bahoohoo Jones!

A remake of The Wizard of Oz…starring Apple Orange!

An all new Batman…starring Bee Buzz!

Lucky us, huh?

Nate's 9!

Dear Nate,


Well, my boy, you are now 9.

You are happy, kind, sweet, and confident. You love and adore the parentals in this house and look forward to time spent together as a family. You obey the rules religiously, and bring logical well-planned arguments for our consideration when you think rules should be altered. Quite honestly, we usually agree with your logic, and make changes accordingly.

Though we don't tell you often enough, we are proud as punch for the maturity you show in times like these. You make it nearly impossible to tell you no, kid.

And you leave me wondering what I ever did to deserve you.

Right now, you are obsessed with all things basketball. Almost every item on your birthday wish list was basketball related. What brings a smile to my face is that most days when I and see you with your sisters, teammates, or friends, offering pointers, and cheering them on, rather than shooing them away to focus on yourself. It's not the game that matters. It's the people who play alongside you that count. A lesson, sweet boy, that we are all learning from you.

Nate, your heart is pure gold.

As you grow into a man, which I know is bound to happen whether I like it or not, I hope you will take this knowledge and lock it deep inside your heart: There is not a day goes by that I don't thank god for sending me you. You are truly a noble soul. Your sweetness of spirit is infectious and brings joy to all those around you. You are quick to laugh, especially at yourself, and so easy to love.

You make me smile each and every day.

Thank you for showing me just how fantastically wonderful boys can be.

I love you, Nate. And I always will.

Love, Mama

To the Tired and Weary:

This is a letter to the tired and weary, at the beginning of this New Year. I write this to you with MUCH joy and hope for your future.
You can consider this a letter to the past, to the me of January 2011. When I felt indeed alone and lost and weary. Beyond hope and full of despair. I felt my dreams crushed and beyond my reach. I felt isolated and in the dark. It was a tough, tough spot.
And I know that chances are, with the traffic that comes through these "doors,” that some of you reading this know EXACTLY where I was, because you are there. This letter is to you.


Dear sweetly broken girl,

I know you feel hopeless and "done.” I know you are tired of trying and want to give up. I know that you do not know how you will get through the rest of the day, let alone another whole year that looms ahead of you. I know you feel like your prayers fall on deaf ears...that God feels further than he has ever been. Can I gently suggest that he may be closer than ever? That the shadows that surround you may be the hand of God hiding you in the cleft of the rock protecting you?

Exodus 33:22 says, "When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by."

That means His hand is on you. Protecting you from danger. I know it does not feel that way. Believe me, I know. You have never felt further from His touch. You feel punished. You feel deserted. But HE IS THERE. Use this time to push towards Him. When you are sad, read the Bible. When you hurt, read a devotional. When you feel alone, read the Bible. When you are desperate pray...out loud...in a scream if you must. Give it your all, He can take it. DIG your heels in and refuse to let go. Pull from every ounce of stubbornness you can muster up. Stick to your guns. Go through the same motions that you would if things were "normal.” In some areas, I dare say, "Fake it till you make it.”

God has not left you. He is not punishing you. He still loves you. He has a plan FOR YOU. It is better than yours is. I can testify to the facts that if we had gotten all we prayed for in January of 2011, that we would be in worlds of hurt come January 2012.

I can trace most of the steps of both answered and unanswered prayers from the last year and time has brought much confusion into focus, in a way, that only time can. I can tell you, that if God doesn't answer a prayer the way you would like, that He is either protecting you or has something better in mind. Or both.

I just do not want you to give up.

There is good around the corner. This time next year or in the future, you will be wiser. And better. More patient and more kind. If you are seeking Him, you will be closer than ever. You will fight for the presence that you have with him now because...

He is close to the brokenhearted.

Do not waste this chance to grow.
Do not give up.

I have noticed that people, who do these things, do so at the least appropriate time in their lives, ever. By doing these things, you are only doing the bidding of the enemy. He wants you alone and isolated.

You are punishing yourself, not God.

To HEAR God, you have to put yourself in His proximity. You have to know Him and seek Him to HEAR Him. It just does not work with wishing.

I am just here to beg you to not give up. It does get better.

As I sit here, at the start of a new year, I feel like I am carrying around less "junk" than EVER in my life. And I know it is by the grace of God and my stubbornness to BE JOYFUL. I know that I am "better" than ever because instead of isolating myself, I rolled up my sleeves and said, "Let's do this.”

My dreams have been restored. And they gleam more than ever before. Instead of pining that we are not home YET, I am making sure that every decision and action we take takes us closer to that goal. I am restoring and reaching out and pushing forward. I am enjoying THIS day and whatever it brings. I am choosing to be thankful and focus on our blessings.

It is a process to get through a year. But YOU CAN DO IT!

I want you to know that you are not alone. I believe that you can push through.

I will leave you with this fresh thought, for a fresh new year. One that YOU can choose to make awesome:
“Behold, I am making all things new.” Rev 21:5

That is present tense, my friend.

Much love and hope to you in this New Year of the new you,
Lindsey